diamonds and graphite

    So this week had been one of the toughest week i've been ,There have been 2 sgs in one day , lots of last minute works but in the end we managed to survive because that is what we always do,surviving.But recently all of those thoughts starts to consume myself as finals are approaching as we were left with only 3 weeks before we face our first finals together,that is. Funny how we thought this five years is very long yet our first semester is ending and it feels like ,yesterday was our first day here and we are not even ready , at least  i am not ready for finals.

what if i fail this final ?

 All of this thoughts are lingering in our mind because nothing , trust me, nothing is 100% sure, you might  have a high carry mark yet fail your final exam  and you might fail all of those quizsssss yet managed to score on your final exam , because everything depends on you .That is why we put our best efforts into this,because even if you fail the previous test ,it doesn't mean you are going to fail for the next one and the same goes when you ace your test.

   

And seek help through patience and prayer, and indeed, it is difficult except for the humbly submissive [to Allah ] [2:45

I know everything will be difficult from now on but you can bet on me , if you seek help from your lord, He will not abandon you, no matter how many times you fail.In every dark tunnel there will be lights, or in every storms there will be rainbows , everything will be okay in the end and if it is not , it is not the ending just yet

Verily, with hardship comes ease -Surah Ash-Sharh (The Relief)

     No matter how lost you are in your studies there is still a chance.I know you (might or might not) already taste failure but that makes you even better because some people doesn't even know what failing is and you've gained an upperhand than them because only ones who fails know the true taste of success .

    JUST.DON'T.EVER.GIVE.UP .Things will be tough but verily with hardship comes ease.There will be times when you want to give up so bad and quit medicine, or even when you want to give up because you are affraid that you will not make it or " i won't make it anyway, might as well enjoy it ". The thing is DON'T ever let the risk of failure from holding you from doing something that you should. DON'T ever give up and pick the easiest way , because humans shouldn't do something that makes him happy but you should do something that makes you great.You don't know how beautiful you are when you don't give up, or even when you put your 100% into things you like . How often we see successful people and yearns to be like them , The thing is they don't give up just like how J. K. Rowling author of Harry potter was rejected many times by publisher, or even when Dr Beni fails his studies(he told this story when i was in pasum ) but yet managed to be a cardiologist .Did you know graphite and diamonds are both made of carbons ? but what makes them different ?pressure.

 so are you someone who endure the pain and pressure good enough that you turns into diamond ? or are you someone who is contempt with easy ways  and aims to be a graphite ?

your choice.your life

to love or not to love ?

     Assalamualaikum and a very good evening i bid to all .This is basically my first post so i'm a bit nervous >< needless to say that i've been wanting to have a blog for quite sometime because this piece of mind always wonder so why not chain and shackles  those free and thoughtless ideas to some kind of internet diary ?

   
    Man made media ,movies and such always depicts on how happy you are when you are in love.Showing how,  you, an independent man/ woman who had been alone all this time ,who had thought about abandoning humanity itself because you yourself never thought of having such childish emotions, such as love and compassion but suddenly when you met this one person, everything changed. You, who had closed your heart, cutting bonds because you wanted too, even building walls just to protect  yourself from this unknown feeling that fluctuates in this heart of yours.Those walls of insecurity, fear of being hurt, all shattered by this person.

You ,who always depend on yourself ,suddenly want to rely on this person.

You, who always pampered yourself, suddenly want to be pampered by this person.

You, who always trust no one except yourself, suddenly trust this person more than yourself, even when this person is hurting you.

Oh, how happy we are, to  rely, to be pampered and to trust. But then , this person that  you rely on , that same person you trust, hurts you.

Those long and long awaited conversation that you have turns into a boring  and dull one ,

" heyyyyyyyy " turns to "yo",

" okay" turns to "k"

Even the smallest thing can turn into a fight.That colorful life of yours turns black and white all of the sudden.Nothing excites you anymore,not even your fav food and beverages.All of those sad songs that you can relate,all of those sleepless night because of crying ,all of the romantic movies that reminds you of them , all of those advice from your friend,everything, reminds you of them.You,one who was strong , now is as fragile as ever   .This one person which invades your heart , the same person who can give you 1001 feelings are also the one who can hurt you the most , crushed your confidence , make you doubt yourself .Those suffocating feelings that you felt when everything has turn to sour when you remember this one person is just someone  you just met but is so special  , this one person changes from stranger, to best friends , to lovers and back to stranger. But then , nothing can be changed , because you give up on this person , or they gave up on you ,and you accept it the way it is (or not). You cried every night because of letting this person slips out your wall of insecurity by showing your naked emotions ,giving  nothing but honesty but getting heartbroken as a result .You start to build those wall ,depends on no one but yourself , pampering yourself because you are special ,trusting no one.But then , suddenly out of nowhere ,this other person gave you a hell lot of other feelings ,crushing this wall ,giving you pure euphoria like the previous one .

Then, you ask yourself once again , To love or not to love ?

and the cycle perpetuates

hi all